Ass Cowboy

Giddie up partner!
and get it here quick
sling your lasso 
'round my hitchin' stick

I've got a hankerin' for booty
an addiction to feed
i roll through your bunkbeds
like a tumbleweed

I've got a big gun
and it's not a toy
come 'n get it!
I'm your Ass Cowboy

i know i wear it well-
my white cowboy hat
but i must ask you this question
Do these boots make me look fat?

my pink bandanna may
make me look like a fairy
but i can't pull off a bonnet 
like little house on the prairie

its certainly chilly-
a bad choice perhaps
i should have worn pants
or something underneath these chaps

I've got too many holes 
in these here dungarees
guess i shouldn't spend
so much time on my knees

i tried some snake oil
but it just couldn't change
the dog-burned truth that
I'm a homo on the range